Roses are gray, violets are gray. I am a dog.

A man walks into a bar with a monkey...I forget the rest but your mother is a hor.

Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't become rotisserie with a side of hash brown.

Q How do you make the fire fighter sad? A Kill his dog

In a nerd wedding they don't say "i do" They say "i accept the terms and conditions"

What do you call a cup that holds liquid A cup

So a horse walks into a bar, oh wait Sarah Jessica Parker

Knock! Knock! Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock! Knock! Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock! Knock! Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad this joke is over?

BOB:i feall like a hotdog JOE:u r what u eat BOB:no wonder your a d!(k JOE:f*** u

Q.) What do you call a black man on the moon? A.) An astronaut.

How did the little boy get lost? He didnt he got dragged into a van and was raped violently.

a disabled man takes a walk in a park

If you're American when you go into the bathroom , and you're American when you go into the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom. Ha, joke is on you because Americans don't pee.

there once was a chicken it was yellow

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Steve" "Oh hey Steve, come on in"

Your mom is so stupid that she failed out of high school and now has two jobs to support her family.

What happens when cole goes into a dark room? It's not possible his hair puts off too much light

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Relizing its a used tampon covered with blood.

I was taking a major shiit in the bathroom stalls at the college and someone walked in on me, talk about awkward

What do you call a fat man that breaks into your house at 2 a.m. and steals your money and your television? Probably a dumbass, a jackass, a moron, an idiot, or something in that general area.

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A jew is a person contending to the faith of Judaism, and a pizza is an Italian flat normally round or square baked good consisting of dough, tomato sauce, cheese and various spices, and is sometimes enjoyed with toppings such as meat or vegetables

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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