Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She had finished her breakfast and had to get to her job as a firefighter.

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What do you get when you mix hydrochloric acid and a humans digestive track? Death.

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What did the boy find I'n his water? Ice

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Three examples of how santa is gay 1) he says HO HO HO 2) he sneaks into your house at night from going down the chimney 3) he knows when u r sleeping and he knows when u r awake BONUS............. Better not pout, you better not cry, better watch out im telling u why.........SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO TOWN

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to smash with a sledgehammer. The other is a baby.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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What's worse than being fired? Eating a bucket of diarrhea.

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Girl: I wanna get yo pants. Boy: but im wearing shorts.

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A man stumbles into a bar and yells, "Let's get wa-" and falls to the floor dead. The forensic scientists preform an autopsy and find that after 15 years of achoholism and depression caused his heart to stop beating. His family may have mourned his loss, if he had not left them penniless after killing his wife.

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What did the blind, deaf and dumb boy get for Christmas? Cancer

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A little boy came runing to his mum' mummy...can a little girl have ababy? Mom reply no...so, the boy ran out and told his frnd 'we can play naked again'.,

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What was the black woman doing in the kitchen? She was simply washing her hands after eating dinner.

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? Because Suzie was a cucumber.

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? when people don't understand the concept of anti-jokes and post real jokes

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What's the difference between an elephant & a toaster? ....you can't tell the difference between an elephant & a toaster??

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Q: What did the kid with no arms get for christmas? A: A set of Legos

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Why was the lady afraid of rocks? Because her husband was stoned.

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The one under this is a fake. i wrote the real one

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A man realizes the whole time he has wanted to fly like a bird. His funeral was two weeks later

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what do you find at the top of mountains? things

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Roses are red Violets are blue My head itches I'm going to get this guy to itch it for me

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by your great grandma

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whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews are productive members of society. -Canis

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what did the guy think who woke up with his hands and feet nailed to a barn. IS THIS BECAUSE IM BLACK!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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