Want to know how the dyslexic man with no left arm and no left leg? All left

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whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? the pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven. By darragh Hamilton

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There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? I don't know, you should check the zoo's surveillance camera.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Charles Grodin. Charles Grodin who? Exactly.

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Q: How do you make an mail man cry? A: Take his car and run over his family.

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A black man is in line for a club. The bouncer says: This is a white party only. The black man says: Damn, I wasnt aware I had to wear white clothing. He then left the line and told himself to check the promotional page on facebook more often.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I don't know how to rhyme Refrigerator ------------

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What did the... Uh, I forgot the rest of the joke.

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I took my sick iguana to the Vet. He said why did you bring him to me, a former soldier?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I just shot up a plaground Now Im heading to an orphanage

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What happened when the white man went to Nigiria? He turned gray.

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what did the toe say to the other toe? nothing they cant speak

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It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

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Roses are black Violets are black A black person died

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A Christian and an atheist are in a bar. Neither one knows the other's religion and they continue to drink.

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What's worse than nailing 10 babies to one tree? nailing 1 baby to ten trees.

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What comes after Friday? A ?.

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What do you call a woman who is addicted to crack, has a light mustache and huge saggy tits, has had 4 kids with 4 different fathers and makes her living giving hand-jobs behind the bus station? Mom.

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My math homework brings all the asians to the yard and their like it wasent that hard and their like it wasent that hard. comment what song it is like.

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why did suzie fall of the swings? because she had no arms.

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Why do Asian men love noodles? Noodles are delicious!

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a naked man walks into a bar the police arrived 10 minutes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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