Want to hear a joke? No.

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Knock knock Who's there It's a policeman informing you that your parents have been killed in a car crash. Your Dad, who has been struggling with substance abuse and depression, found out his wife had been cheating on him, and in a drunken rage, wrapped the car around a tree.

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A horse walks in to a bar. The bartender asks: "why the long face?" The horse didn't respond, because it's a horse.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Josh. Lettuce who? I didn't say "lettuce"... I said Josh.

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So a man walks into a hospital to see his dying wife..... walks into her room falls over and then dies

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knock knock who's there your moms dead im sorry

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Suck pussy

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What do u call a man pointing a gun at you? A man with an anger issue

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Whats more fun than throwing a dead baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitchfork.

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what do you call a man with no arms or legs? numerous abusive terms as you kickk him to death.

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there once was a cat it was brown? fus-roh-dah

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Q: Why did Sally keep falling off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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What happened to the gay guy? He died of aids...

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whats brown and sticky? Doody

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What's red and black and looks good on a Jew? A bullet wound.

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Q. What did the mockingbird say to the blue jay? A. I mock you by mocking you

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man:"gullible is written on the celling" boy looks up

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How many holes can you poke in my chest, When my chest is by far the best If you believe you can stab Then then grab a knife...that you can grab Skewer my breast Which lies on the best chest And you will discover A man under your covers Yes, keep on pokin' Poke my chest with the knife you are strokin' And then swallow a chode because you are stupid.

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What's your favorite Sylvia Plath quote? "Turn on the oven."

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Maroon 5 to a bitch: Cross my heart and hope to die... wait why don't i just kill you bitch!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daffodils are yellow, Flowers come in lots of colours...

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knock knock who's there? Orange Oranges cant talk, so seriously, who's there Your mother Ha ha real funny -mother opens door with her key-

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how many terminaly ill 5 year old cancer patients does it take to burn to supply enough energy to make toast just 4.5 :)

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What did one Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I would tell you but i don't speak Chinese therefore i have no way of translating it for you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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