Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

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How do you call a guy that ran over 10 children A bad driver

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I found out I had asthma earlier today. I was breathless.

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What happend when they were 3 guys in the air? They were skydiving

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Whats blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint.

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Whats better than winning an award? Not having your family shot to death

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How do you get 1,000 dead babies into a car? Blender How do you get them out? Straw

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What gets bigger and bigger and bigger, then dies? A baby.

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What's big fat and ugly? A monster

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Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his forehead

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A manly man drives up in a yellow bug, What do the girls think? They think its very manly! (;

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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I used to be addicted to soap, but now I'm clean. I'm still addicted to heroin, though. No chance I'm ever giving that up.

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a Guinness.

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make me a sandwich! what kind?

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What's a vampire's favorite dessert? Vampire's don't exist What's Helen Keller's favorite dessert? Helen Keller doesn't exist

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Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

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So, this cheerio is in love with a beautiful frosted cheerio. He asks her on a date. She says no, because she only dates other frosted cheerios. So the cheerio works really hard at his job and is promoted to a honey-nut cheerio. So he asks her out again. She says no because she only dates frosted cheerios. So he works even harder and is made a frosted cheerio. He asks her out again and she accepts. 4 months later after a relationship built on trust and understanding they are married and live a long and fullfilling life together.

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Why did the sloth cross the road To fuck your gay cousin

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: WHERE'S MY TRACTOR?!

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot, you racist.

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

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-Bumper Sticker- Honk if you love Jesus. (Text while driving if you want to meet him)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops