What's the difference between Elisabeth Fritzl and Pope John Paul II? Pope John Paul II wasn't imprisoned and raped continuously over a 24 year period in a horrific act of cruelty by his father

Q: What did the clam say to the postman? Moral: "Hey its me the worlds only talking clam! How you doing dude!"

What did the shark say to the beached whale? Nothing.

I want to name my dog Syndrome. Then, when I teach him to sit, I can say "Down, Syndrome!"

Why did a Jewish man have no hair left? He recently got a haircut.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

A Muslim walks into a bar, and has a pint of lager because he has chosen to integrate into his host country's culture. He then leaves without incident.

A Christian and an Atheist are sitting next to each other in a bar. C: Sad you don't believe in God, 'cuz you'll go to hell after your death. A:I don't believe in hell neither..

whats worse than a pile of dead babies? two piles of dead babies.

What is more difficult than trying to get blood from a stone? Trying to teach it Japanese in the process. [L]

How did the guy fall off the roof? He was pushed

bangers and mash?

What do you call a black man? Rob

Do you know what happens to a toad when it's struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

why is my phone broken i dropped it

What is the difference between a Jew and a Muslim? Their religion.

Maybe we simply need to keep the door open, but one cannot bring happiness to others, until one is happy oneself. Do I change something within you Red?

Wanna hear a clean joke? A little boy took a bath with Bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is the name of the man.

What did god say to Jesus. "Dude, she's not a virgin"

What's sweet and tastes like candy? Candy, now get in the van.

Seriously, I am going to tell you, but you know, what would you have preferred that it was if you could choose, I am kinda insecure about these things, and people can read these messages so...

Why does everyone treat Jesus as some sort of saint for making five thousand people bread, when Hitler made six million people toast?

What is white and shaped like a refrigerator? A refrigerator.

how do you make a baby cry? put a nail through its foot

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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