Three dogs are barking at a wall. People walk by thinking "Why are these dogs barking at a wall?".

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My dad is lactose intolerant. He shouldn't eat cheese.

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A girl and her friend got into a fight. They both bled to death.

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I used to have a shirt just like yours, except it was green. And it was a bicycle.

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What did the boy who was in a chainsaw accident yell to his mom when he was on a rollercoaster? Look ma, no hands!

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i have a story to tell u!!! oh s*** i forgot!

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Why did Lindsay Lohan talk to her car? Because she's insane

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what is Rebecca black's favorite restaurant? Ruby Tuesdays

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What did the coat say to the dog? Nothing, the coat was inanimate

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What did the German say to the Rabbi? Hello. The German was also Jewish

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The closest I've been to an animal charity was when I walked past it to by myself a fur coat

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

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Help me I need to know how to cook a human fetus by tomorrow does anyone know any good recipes?

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A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his village.

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Tim likes girls

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What did the black person say to the white person I'm black your white

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What did the two best friends do before the asteroid hit the Earth? They hugged each other goodbye.

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What is black and blue and doesn't like sex? The 6 year old in my basement.

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What do you get when you cross an owl, with a bungee cord?..... My ass.

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Wha....You probably shouldnt read the rest of this because i lie a lot (This joke deserves lots of thumbs and comments!)

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What did the fat man say when he saw the giant twinky on the billboard? I wish that twinky was real, because I am too poor to pay my bills, am getting audited, and cannot feed my four children on minimum wage.

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What do you call a something with no limbs? a snake

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a older brother and a lil brother have bunk beds, one night the older brother has his gf sneak over, they are going to have sex. he tells his gf, "say lettace for a new positon and say tomato for stop", they start and she screams, "lettace, tomato, lettace, tomato". then the lil brother says " will you guys stop making salad, ur getting mayonase all over my face!!!!"

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There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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