Two Canadian men are sitting in a room. Man 1: Do you know what happens when you shoot a wolverine? Man 2: No. Man 1: It absorbs the bullets, duh. The second man proceeds to go outside with a gun. He returns in a few minutes. Man 1: What did you do with that gun? Man 2: I shot a wolverine. Man 1: What happened? Man 2: It fell over and died. I think you watch too much X-Men.

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Two guys walk into a bar, a spanish guy and a black guy. They get some drinks, call a taxi to arrive home safe. And kiss their wives and kids goodnight. They go to bed early after reading a wallstreet journal. And wake up early so they can both go to their jobs as college professors. To white kids.

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OH MY LUMPIN GOD!

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Your mother is so fat, she struggles to control her weight even with dieting. Obesity and heart disease runs is in her mother's side of the family; she and everyone close to her is very concerned.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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What did the African-American toddler from Compton get for his birthday? Most likely nothing, seeing as his father left his mother briefly after his birth, and his mother uses all of her money to feed her heroin addiction.

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What do you call an arab ?

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women are like buddhist shrines, you don't piss on them

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Indians

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why did the black man go to jail why he raped your mom

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every man comes from between a women's legs for the rest of their lives they try to get back in

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no.

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what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies?

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Knock Knock Who's there? Santa Santa who? Imwatching you!

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What's the difference between two elephants? One is dead.

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What's big, black, and just knocked an 8 year old girl off of her bike? The refrigerator I just threw at her. (not all are white you know)

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whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout? - The boy scout comes home from camp.

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knock knock who's there bob bob who bob marley who else

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Q: What's white and sticky? A: Glue.

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What's the deal with airline food? Food tastes different on an airplane. The atmosphere dries out your nose, the air pressure numbs 1/3 of your taste buds, and low humidity levels give you cotton mouth. These factors cause the food to taste worse than it normally would.

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What do you call a black pilot? A PILOT

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There is a really funny joke which can only be seen by smart people, it goes as such:

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What's the difference between Batman and a black guy? One is a guy that dresses up like a bat and fights crime and the other is just a mild-mannered person.

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What do you call the offspring of an elephant? A baby elephant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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