Why did to plane crash because the pilot was a tomato

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Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

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Why do thieves shower before undertaking a robbery? Probably part of their morning routine.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Cindy Cindy who? No it's Cindy Lou Who!

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What do you get when you cross black man and a Hispanic woman A child that is a combination of both ethnic groups

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What's worse than a dead baby? A baby.

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Johnny fell out of the window. Except he didn't fall I pushed him

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Knock knock. Who's there? Bob, your neighbor. Okay, come in.

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What did the lawyer name his daughter? Amanda.

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OMG I JUST FOUND THE GREATEST WEBSITE YOU SHOULD TOTALLY CHECK IT OUT OMG ITS http://anti-joke.com/submit

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Two whales are in a bar. One says, "whoaohaoahwoahwahoh" The other says, "Go home, Frank. You're drunk."

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Why did Jimmy burn the American flag? He was Canadian.

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yo mama is so old, so old that she was given senior citizen discount at the restaurant.

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A Blonde walks into a bar. She is in an abusive relationship and drinking her pain away.

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Repeat after me: Silk, Silk, Silk, What's the square root of 465?

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Q:Why did Jimmy eat an apple? A:He was hungry.

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So, why won't the blonde date the Asian guy? Because she's afraid of commitment.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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What did the boy with cancer, no arms, and no legs get for his birthday? Nothing he was dead.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Cargo. Cargo who? Cargo beep beep.

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Man- Where can I find a book on the holocaust Book keeper- Have you tried comedy? Man- no I havent Book keeper- good it won't be there

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How many babiess it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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The boy asks his dad if he can make him a sandwitch The dad reply's " no thats your moms job"

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Why did the monkey die? he was stapled to a grenade

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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