Whats the difference between a boy scout and a jew? A boy scout gets to come home after camp.

who do we all like george goodburn

What is the difference between menstrual blood and sand? You can't gargle sand.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Umm... Why would it not?

how does chuck norris eat an apple Just like every other person

Q: Who was shot 50 years ago? A: Abraham Lincoln was shot 50 years ago! (=

How do you drown in a tea cup? You find a big enough tea cup.

What were the muslims doing on the plane? Probably going somewhere that was too far to walk or drive.... just like everyone else on the plane.

What is the same about a Duck and a Pickle? Neither of them can ride a bike.

how come the tadpoles dad told him he can't be a nurse? he has 2 b a frog!

What do Kurt Cobain and a whale have in common? Both have holes in the back of their heads

why did the chicken cross the road? because he frickin wanted to!!!!!!

How do you stop a bus from hitting you?? You throw small children to impede the progress of the bus.

a blonde takes 1 hour to swim 100m of breaststroke.

It's all shits and giggles until someone giggles and shits.

I'm a Banker. A woman asked if I could check her balance... So I pushed her off a cliff.

Your mom is so ugly that she often finds it difficult attracting members of the opposite sex.

What is white, red, and all in your girlfriend? red and white blood cells

i was born with 99 medical problems, and the difficulty to count till 100.

I was very thirsty so I decided to go get some soda.Upon reaching the soda store I discovered a very long line. I decided to leave the line and instead get some milk, unfortunately once again there was a long line at the milk store. Discouraged by still thirsty I decided to try to luck at the punch store. There was a long line there also.

Whats Barack Obama's favorite number ? 7

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza? The black man is a human being with all of man's well-deserved rights, and the large pizza is an edible item. Furthermore, the black man, if adult and employed, has the propensity to feed a family of four far longer than a large pizza can.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge asked "Mum, why is my name Fridge?" to which she replied "Because you deserve to be in one."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...