Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. That's what she said

what did one gagged man say to the other gagged man? nothing he was gagged

Why couldn't the teenager go to the pirate movie? He didn't have any money.

I would piss if alex berry had aids n died

what do you call a black man flying a plane? a pilot. what do you call a woman flying a plane? 9/11.

George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

What did the black guy say when after he jumped in the pool? Wow, its kinda chilly.

What do you get when you cross Dracula and a snowman. Probably a little startled from the man's Dracula costume and a little chilly because the weather is cold enough to support a snowman.

A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism.

What is green and can hurt your eyes? I don't know, but its definitely not a laser pointer.

Q: What did Batman say when Robin was in the Batmobile? A: Robin, get out of the Batmobile.

Why isn't Billy Mays on TV anymore? Beacause Billy Mays was in a tradgic accident where a bowling ball fell on his head, and a couple days later he died of head trama. His family can't bear to hear his voice anymore.

what did the white man call a black man that was awarded the job he applied for? He stated the man was a hard worker and deserved the job. Then he walked up to the man with a smile and congraduated him. Then he went home and commited suicide after he concluded he didnt deserve to live.

What do you call a black priest? "Father" if you are Christian.

Why is this website called anti-jokes? i don't know but it makes sense.

What did god say to Jesus. "Dude, she's not a virgin"

How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

feminism

What is the difference between a Jew and a Muslim? Their religion.

What is brown and sticky? A lot of things are brown and sticky

How do my feet smell? Oh wait. They can't. Feet are not sentient independent beings and therefore cannot experience the five senses, including smell.

Why cant Helen Keller drive? ......because women cant drive(:

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme. This one doesn't.

ohai. whutz en ahntei johk? sownz soopihd.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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