knock knock whos there? aids aids who? aids aids who? i dont go away

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a screaming goat

thumb_up thumb_down +14

View Terms of Service

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A policeman walks into a pretzel shop. He sees two freshly baked pretzels. One was a salted.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what do you call a black man who bakes bread? a baker. you racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Their was once a man named Bob Clemens who really wanted to have sex with an underage girl. So one day he went on an online chat site to find one. He ran into this young girl and told her all the things he wanted to do to her and she told him that she had never done anything and really wanted to try it. Bob went over to her house one day and she told him to sit down and grab some cookies while she came back. She came back and Bob gave her the roughest pounding that any human being could recieve.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A man wakes up after only one hour of sleep due to his insomnia. He starts to cry because his wife just passed away and his parents were recently killed in a car accident. The man gathers his composure, takes a shower, and drives to his minimum wage job. He was expelled from high school for an assault he didnt even commit and has no money to get an education. At work, he accidentally drops a box of valuable, fragile electronic parts and gets fired by his boss. He goes home to his dirty 1 bedroom apartment and contemplates suicide. He decides to wait as his favorite tv show is on. He turns on the tv to the news his show has been cancelled. The man, depressed, suicidal and alone, picks up his .22 and kills himself. There is no God.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How does Lady Gaga like her meat? Cooked until it reaches an internal temperature of 180 degrees Fahrenheit to lower the risk of contracting diseases such as salmonella.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Roses are red, Violets are microwaves, I have amnesia, Roses are red.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How about that airplane food? Ive never been on a plane you tell me

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A blonde walked into a hair salon. She got her hair dyed black, as she is sick and tired of jokes that scrutinize those with blonde hair.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q. What do birds and a mouse have in common... A. Nothing there two different species

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Robin Williams walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? To which Robin Williams replies, "Because I'm going to kill myself."

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A Muslim walks into a bar, and has a pint of lager because he has chosen to integrate into his host country's culture. He then leaves without incident.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the black dude die? Because everyone must die at some point.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did Sally fall off the swing. She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down +14

hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down +14

ewrg

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why is bobsledding the coolest sport? Because this is my subjective opinion.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Mr. Krabs lives in bikini bottom (pinch pinch)

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A man named Hank, from Idaho takes a trip to Michigan. When he arrives, he rents a house and starts a meth lab. Hank is spending 7 years in jail. Hank was charged with stealing.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Obesity runs in your family. To bad no one runs in your family.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

This guy was walking down the street and a homeless guy asked him for money. The guy said "Why don't you get a job?" So the homeless guy began to cry because all he wanted was a dime not to be humiliated.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the women leave the kitchen? Because the The husband told her to...

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops