How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What were the muslims doing on the plane? Probably going somewhere that was too far to walk or drive.... just like everyone else on the plane.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What did the computer say to his girlfriend? I'm going to RAM you tonight.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Knock knock. Who's there? Ryan. Ryan who? Ryan Seacrest.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

An Irishman and his sheep are locked in a barn together for 3 days. On the 3rd day his wife finally notices that he is gone, and comes looking in the barn for her husband. She liberates him, cooks him dinner, and they both laugh at the bestiality that occurred in the barn. 3 days is indeed a long time for anyone to endure.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What's more absurd than a goldfish astronaut? A jew that cares about palestinians

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Knock Knock Whos There? I'p I'p who? HAHAHAHA

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What do blueberries, oranges, watermelons, doors, curtains, backpacks, spoons, asian men, bicycles, asian men on bicycles, shrimp, books, eagles, dinosaurs, watermelons wearing backpacks filled with shrimp and orange spoons, feet, limes, binders, paper, candles, chicken nuggets, tvs, chairs, floors, refridgerators, and humidifiers have in common? Barnes and Noble

thumb_up thumb_down -32

OH MY LUMPIN GOD!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

A duck walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender serves the duck the beer. Later, the bartender wonders to himself when his life got so out of control.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What comes after Friday? A ?.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why did the man eat a human heart? Because he was part of a dangerous, religious cult.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

ive been a naughty girl, and i need something to plug my hole. call or text me;) 1 (802) 299-5281

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why did the man eat the cat? I don't remember the punchline, but trust me it was hilarious.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

you were so loud you woke helen keller up!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -34

How many dead babies can you fit in a trunk? 37.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did Prius driver go to jail? Because he ran over someone and then fled the scene of the crime (at 11 mph)

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What is an anti joke? It's jokes about jews, blacks, and walking out of bars LIKE AN IRISHMAN

thumb_up thumb_down -34

A priest a rapist and a child molester walk into a bar. He orders a drink

thumb_up thumb_down -34

I used to get on Facebook, then someone asked me to save a child in Africa by liking a picture of Jesus or ignore it and go to hell

thumb_up thumb_down -34

two muffins are sitting in an oven one muffin turns and says "boy it`s hot in here" the other muffin can`t bring himself to explain to the other they are about to be eaten alive.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What did the boy with no parents get for Christmas from his Grampa? Nothing because his Grampa had alzheimer's disease -Flap

thumb_up thumb_down -34

josh sucks polish adams dick

thumb_up thumb_down -34

why did suzy get hit by the bus because she got dumped into the road and she had no legs

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops