A guy walks into a bar. He must have been blind or something.

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What has four legs and is always ready to travel? Siamese twin fugitives.

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Three kids are playing on the swings. One of the kids falls off. He then gets up, gets back on the swing and continues playing.

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What would the Swatch be called if it was made by a Croatian company? A Crwatch.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She was too tired and was afraid that if she got behind the wheel it might cause her to fall asleep at the wheel which would result in an accident.

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What is exceptionally dangerous? Shaving while taking a bath, because the risk of electrocution is extremely high.

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Man: Knock knock Man 2: who's there Alzheimer's patient: to get to the other side!

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How did the idiot die? He comitted suicide because people were picking on his stupidity. (If you laughed at this you are a horrible person)

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Knock knock no answer, as the tenant of the house was out shopping.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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what is so funny about billy? nothing he is dead and if you laught at him you are the biggest jerk by: Brennan pickrell

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What do an eagle and a mole have in common? They both fly, except for the mole.

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Obama ran for re-election in 2012. He lost because he is a horrible president. the liberal left blame his defeat on racists and propose harsh Hate-Crime punishments. America falls into disrepair.

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What's the difference between a black man and a Ginger? Their pigmentation.

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Why did the blond woman throw a clock out the window? She was going through a bitter divorce, and didn't want her ex-husband's things in her house anymore.

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50 gay man and a homophobe are in a nightclub in Florida ...you know how the rest goes.

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A muslim man with a long beard and wearing a turban and robe boards an aircraft with a large suitcase. The plane later arrives at its destination a few minutes past the estimated arrival time due to bad weather.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I'm not sure, but the farmer must be very upset about the loss of one of his chickens.

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A man walks in to a bar. He gets a cuncussion and his heath insurance isn't enough to cover his physical therapy. He dies poor and alone.

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Friends are like balloons When you stab them they die.

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Q: what do you call a boy with no arms and an eye patch? A: names

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Why is travis so funny? Trick question, He died of cancer 3 years ago.

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if bought jim bought 78 sweets and he eats 68 what does jim have left? diabetes

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What's worse than rotten eggs? Being dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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