A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out that your mother just got raped by ten black men and then coming home to her dead body and getting raped by the same men who raped your mom.

A kid is riding down the street when his chain pops off his bicycle. The kid yells "God damn!" as he begins to fix it. A priest walking nearby overhears the boy taking god's name in vein and says "Don't say 'God damn' say 'God help us'". The kid says, "I am an atheist, get away from me".

A man walks into a room with a sly grin on his face, "Tom, have I got a joke to tell YOU!" Tom hurriedly shoos Susie into her bedroom and tells her to lock the door and not open it no matter what. Tom turns to the man, "I've told you twice before to never come back here, I'm beginning to think that you probably don't take what I say very seriously because you might have some sort of chemical imbalance or something in your head, or maybe you're obsessed with my family or something!" The man hangs his head in shame and agrees with Tom, but Tom still had to do something about the intruder so he called the cops. The cops took him to get psychologically analyzed, but Tom didn't know this because he only cared that his daughter Susie was safe and he also doesn't have access to the testing facility's records. Tom is an only father.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was tied to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

why did the sock go to kroger cause he was laying on the couch

Want to hear a joke? Sorry, you're looking at the wrong website.

What do you get with two banana peels? Compost.

what did Tyrone get for Christmas he got shot by isis

Five guys one rape.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows. Chickens aren't capable of knowing why they do things.

Tim: Jason, your dumb Jason: No I'm not.

Three construction workers are sitting on a beam high in the air, getting ready to eat their lunch. "Hey!" someone shouts. "Get down from there! That's a safety violation!" So they do, and instead they eat their lunch on the ground.

Why did Hitler go to the hospital? Because he shot and poisoned himself.

What did the 5 year old girl ask Santa for Christmas? A pony.

What did the blind, deaf and mute girl get for christmas? Cancer.

Two black guys walk into a bank They work there.

What do Ethiopians do at night? Sleep

Who's better than badboy? The holocaust.

Q: What do cooks do for a living? A: Eh muffin.

What's worse than 10 babies in one bin? 1 baby in 10 bins.

What do you get when you give a homeless man a sandwich? It thrown at the back of your head.

Whats black, white, and huge? The world if you are a dog.

BIG PENIS

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...