What's worse than 1 bee sting ? 2 bee stings What's worse than 2 bee stings ? the holocaust what's worse than the holocaust ? 3 bee stings

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I walked up to the door and I asked the door how r u door, and he said, I'm a door!

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One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

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Twelve people are in a plane. One of them says: "Man, we really are not so many in this plane" Another one replies: "It's because it's a 12 seats plane." Another says: "Do 12 seats planes even exist?" Another one answers: "Of course they do." Another person says: "Guys, are we even flying?" Someone says: "I don't know" Another says: "Yes, we're flying, look out the window." Another says: "I have cancer." Someone reacts: "Oh, I'm really sorry for you" Another: "Yes, me too" Someone adds: "It's really terrible" Another says: "Has science made any progress recently?" The plane crashes.

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A Sodium atom walks into a bar. A Chlorine atom bumps into it, taking the electron, then making a bond. Suddenly, the police come in. They arrest the Chlorine atom, of course, but they also arrest the Sodium atom. He says, "what did I do?" The policemen say, "you're too ugly to be out in public."

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Knock knock Who's there? Tom Tom who? Tom Rodgers I don't know you Tom decides to leave the house because the person in the house does not recognize him

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A muslim walks into a airport. He then boards his flight and is flown to his destination.

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What do you call a man will dementia who just killed his cousins, wife, children, and teacher. His name. He's still a man until he's put in a mental institution.

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i black man walks in to a bar.he askes if he can make out with you? the man says"no. black man says"why? the guy says"because im not homersexal. black man says"oh. boss says"hey i told you dont talk to black people. guy says"no i can ekplan.boss says no more of buts or buy. boss says" you are fired guy says"NO! boss says"yup both of you get out! guys say no two guards come to talk them out. THE END`DONE!

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What's more fun than thumbing down a shit joke? Thumbing down a shit joke which is neutral previous to your disliking giving it a little negative number.

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what did the bus driver say to the black man when he got on the bus? nothing, carl has become very anti-social since his brother died

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A man walks into a bar. The second man sees the first man's mistake and ducks. The third man needs to take no precautions as he is a midget and can simply walk under the bar.

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Where do babies come from? You fathers penis.

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"Do you have Prince Albert in a can?" "No." "Good. Tobacco causes cancer."

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Who is fat, stupid and pretty dam ugly? (hint: look in mirror)

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What's black and white and red all over? The color spectrum. Along with other colors.

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What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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Yo mom is so stinky that when she gets in a room every one leaves the room

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Two muffins are cooling on a windowsill. One muffin says to the other "It sure is a beautiful day today." The other muffin says "Holy shit! A talking muffin!"

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What do you call a black guy with a white guy name? Bradley

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Q-"what did the carrot say to the plant" A-"nothing because neither one of these objects can talk"

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What do you get if you put a baby in a blender? An Erection

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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