What's worse than getting sockson your birthday? Getting cancer on your birthday.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the difference between a Mexican and a T-Rex? Humans are vertebrates belonging to the Mammalia class, chiefly a member of the species Homo sapiens; dinosaurs are chiefly terrestrial, herbivorous or carnivorous reptiles from the extinct orders Saurischia and Ornithischia.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What is brown, white, and red all over? A part asian part white guy covered in blood after having her girlfriend have her period while they were having sex in a club in alaska near a military school that was abandoned and is now haunted but justin bieber took care of that.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Roses are red, Violets are violet, If you think Violets are blue you're an idiot because they're called violets for a reason.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A man bets that his friend can't drink five beers in a row. His friend does it and says "See, I told you I can do it!" The man replies "No, I can't see, I'm blind."

thumb_up thumb_down -10

teacher: say ur alphabet kid: abcdefghijklmnoqrstuvwuxyz kid:wheres the pee teacher:half way down my leg

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do you make your house smell bad? fart

thumb_up thumb_down -10

roses are red violets are blue ill keep u in my heart forever and ower baby to

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you get when you cross a black guy and a keyboard? A black guy punctured by a keyboard

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why is nate asian? no one knows neither of his parents appear to be of asian desent

thumb_up thumb_down -10

If you could eliminate one thing in your life, what would it be ? My ex.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

"Knock knock" Come in!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the panda say to the other panda? We are fuzzy Oreos

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did Chuck Norris eat a sandwich? Because he was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why was 9/11 funny? It wasnt; amny people died.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do you keep black people from your Kool-aid? How? You put it in a safe-deposit box.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Chip and Dale walk into a bar. Chip is black now.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's worse than the Holocaust? Six Million Jews.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

why was the albino black crying? because all babies cry you racist

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A strange man knocks at the door He's your son

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A:Knock Knock B:It's open

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did one fetus say to they other fetus? Nothing they were aborted.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops