Why did Timmy fall down the stairs Because he is blind and I pushed him

what did the one girl say to the other girl? i like your shoes.

Roses are red, Violets are rare because of the irreversible damage to our ecosystem in recent years.

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead." It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

Why was the man sad? Because he found his 80 year old mother had been raped and murdered in her home...

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Please ignore this statement.

What do you get if you put a baby in a blender? An Erection

Women are only good for seventy-one things: Love A proper home to come home to everyday 69

Whats black on top and white on bottom? R a p e.

you know what? CHICKEN BUTT. butt of chicken ahahahaa

what smells like red paint, but tastes blue? my heroine OD panflets

There once was a man from Madrass, whose balls were made out of brass. This was incredibly embarrassing for him, and rendered him infertile and impotent, which in turn affected his relationships with women.

how do you scare a deaf person? you yawn

A horse walks into a bar and orders a double whiskey. The bar man says "what's with the long face"? The horse replies "My wife left me, took the kids with her, took everything, I'm devastated"

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Gary.

WHAT DYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE MEAN YE DON'T KNOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW?

In Soviet Russia, you wouldn't have a likely chance of surviving because of Stalin's mass paranoia and total neglect for his fellow man.

What did George Washington tell his men before they got on their horses? Men get on your horses.

Q: What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

Q:How do you sleep with Paris Hilton? A:You don't. she got herpes.

What happens when a drunk driver meets a stoned driver? A head on collision

What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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