How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

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- what do u call a dead black person a problem - what do u call a lot of dead black people a big problem - what do you call a mass killing of all black people. genocide

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Knock Knock Who is there? *bang* The following story depicts the life and death of Bob:___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________then he opened the door and was shot in the face.

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Your mom's so ugly that after being ridiculed for for year she became very self conscience and killed herself. Her family was very sad for many years.

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so there was a frog a bear and a walrus... i forgot how the rest goes but they all die because of a nuclear holocaust

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What were the muslims doing on the plane? Probably going somewhere that was too far to walk or drive.... just like everyone else on the plane.

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why did the man have a hole in his face? because syphillis had eaten a hole in it

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how come the tadpoles dad told him he can't be a nurse? he has 2 b a frog!

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What is better than life? Nothing.

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So much with being an author... You with the Feds? The CIA?

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I like cheese. You like cheese. Have a nice day.

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Q: What do you say when you see your T.V. floating at night? A: That's so frickin awesome

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What did Batman tell Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile

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Twelve muffins were baking in an oven. One muffin said "Where are we?" Another muffin said "Yikes! A talking muffin!"

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DINOSAUR Street Fighter 4: Masterchief edition LOUND ONE! BAKE! And the final results: Sagat: Heh, you want some... cornflakes? *BOOO! YOU THUG!" Ryu: WHOWANTSSOMEPOUNDCAKE! *Delicious poundcake omg" "Well, at least better than serving a fucking bowl of foocking cornflakes with milk in four goddamn hours!" YOU LOSE! "You must defeat my Poundcake to stand a chance, I am the worlds greatest pillow fighter!" GAME OVER

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Chuck Norris.

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learn. advance!

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you: have you seen the movie constapated them:no you:its because it hasen't come out yet

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Remember that part where Jesus gets angry at a fig three and kills it because it "was lazy" for refusing to grow figs at winter? Brother Jeez, that was kinda mean man! You know it was winter rite? Anti Joke or not, that part is funny, so if Jesus returns and wants you to make him a sammich you better go get that goddamn sammich!

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What did spongebob say to patrick? Im ready! im ready!

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How do you confuse a Muslim? - Rub his belly.

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Did you hear the one about the broken pencil? Never mind, it's pointless

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sandwich. roller coaster. brain sprout. cholera, meander. time. rivet.porcupine. mayonaise. frying. x-ray forever.

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What follows 2 days of rain? Statistically more rain, but you'll have to check the weather report to be sure.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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