"I vant to blood your suck!" warned Darcula.

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Once upon a time, The end.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food on the other side

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why was the black kid so good at basketball because he practiced a lot

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What do you call a latino with a limp? John...his name is John

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-What did the old lady have for dinner? -Dementia

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Do you know why I am excited? I don't know I'm asking you.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He simply lost grip of the cone and it fell out of his hand

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Why was the dog fallowing the fat guy. The fat guy said come.

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What's worse than getting a parking ticket? Getting Cancer.

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There are two types of people in this world, those that can extrapolate from incomplete data

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Knock knock. Who's there? Boo Boo who? I don't have a last name, it's just Boo

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Why didn't the boy finish the race? He was handicapped

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Adam eats ginger nuts the fookin chicken

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yo mamma so ugly I think she has cancer

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead." It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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In space, no one can hear you scream. Which means Xenomorphs are deaf.

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why couldn't jonny ride on a swing? he had no arms or legs why didn't jonny have any arms or legs? he's a potato!

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Did you know Helen Keller had a doll house? She didn't either.

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Robocop The Reboot reboot. Watch as The friendly robot named Murphy, is violently broken down by a horrible shower of water, the only means to save him is to transfer his data into a human. He awakens again as Robofriendlydude (starring Adam Sandler) as a robot learns to love, learns to share, learns to dance with children in this years Reboot of the classic love comedy Robocop. PG-3 "So good I could only watch five seconds of it" Rotten potatoes. 99 percent fresh. "Kill me with a chainsaw" Honest reviews. "AWESOME!" Dishonest reviews "Makes Twilight seem like the better lovestory" Everyone.

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A Pilot

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How do you kill a turtle? You can't, it has a shell for a reason.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops