Knock knock. Who's there? The police The police who? Sir, your wife is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How come grilled cheese?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

why was 6 afraid of 7? Because ever since 3 died, 7 had changed. He had turned aggressive and randomly snapped and hit out at some of the other numbers for no apparent reason.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men jump out, and the plane crashes anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Tried to type an ascii of a penis, failed

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do u call a dumb Asian. An american

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the bartender say to the upset horse? GET OUT OF MY BAR!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

why are you reading these jokes? i have nothing else to do. ok

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him to leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the drug addict say to the doctor? I am a drug addict and am in need of help and rehabilitation.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

On christmas, a bunch of happy kids get machine guns for christmas.Meanwhile in afghanistan, a bunch of dissapointed kids are getting ice skates.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is blue and rolls ? A blue, rolling thing.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm going to murder you Did you look behind you?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Roses are red, yup.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why are Black Guys Black? Migration and adaptation to the harsh heat of the southern Sahara Desert. DUH.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's 13 inches long and 3 inches wide and drives women crazy? My diick

thumb_up thumb_down -1

1 tip for a flat belly so eating so much u fat bitch

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

thumb_up thumb_down -1

You know what's worse than finding a worm inside an apple? finding crack, too late to spit it out.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what's blue and looks like a shirt? a blue shirt

thumb_up thumb_down -1

whats the difference between a baby and a puppy? i care when the puppy dies....

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Your mother is so fat that her BMI is larger than average.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops