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Whats worst than getting bombed by the russians? The holocaust!

i have no friends actually now i fell bad ... anybody spare money for the bus ahhhhhhh kill me now

Q:What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A: A bike

what did the man do when he fell off the top of a building? Nothing He DIED!!!!!!

A blonde heard that 90% of all crimes occur within a one-mile radius of the home, so she had a security alarm installed.

Friends are just like trees. They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

Why did Little Suzy get hit by a truck? Well the real question is, "Why was Little Suzy in the road," so why was she? Because she felt like it.

a duck walked up to a lemon aid stand and he said to the man running the stand... quack

Oh NOES! She does worry about me! YOU MUST APOLOGIZE! Relax, the body has two sources of happy drugs, one is the sweet calm stuff I am really bad at, and the other comes with adrenaline and stuff, the name of which I do not remember, both are important, but yeah, I am a thrill seeker, and when I do not find them, I make a thrill out of whatever I got, whatever that means.

Why can Michael Jackson no longer moonwalk? because he's dead.

If you're happy and you know it get a life

drew edminstin is a rat

A black guy, Jewish guy, Chinese guy and a normal guy walk into a bar. They were all normal but the race of the last guy could not be easily determined.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Ya. Ya Who? Dot Com.

What do you call a Koala bear that does not have a chin? A Koala bear.

What sound did the Moon Man say to the Moon Woman? Nothing, there isn't an atmosphere so sound cannot travel.

Q: Wanna hear a joke? A: the WNBA

ROSE ARE BROWN VIOLETS ARE BROWN WHO SH*IT IN MY GARDEN!!!!!

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

Why is the beach always so angry? The beach is just sand and waves and lacks sentience, but makes up for it in crabs.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, STDs are contagious. Careful who you screw!

Why does Toby suck! Because he sucks!

In Opposites Land, you might think the opposite of small is big. But no, it's nail clippers.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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