What did the waiter say to an overweight customer? May I take your order?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Dont be racist be like mario he is an italian who looks like a mexican speaks english and picks up coins like a jew.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what do you call 2 walking Arabs with long beards? pedestrians.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A hasidic Rabbi and a member of Hezbollah enter a bar in a Jewish settlement. (No, of course they didn't.)

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why wasn't 7 afraid of 6? Numbers are numbers and therefore incapable of feeling any emotion.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do you find dennis ferguson? Look at danyons bckground

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Cosmopolitan magazine releases an issue without any sex tips.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

a ginger named corey walks into a bad and gets pistol whipped after raping his classmate

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are red. Violets are blue. The Clouds are white. Thank God I am too.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the kid trip over the rock? Because he was diagnosed with serious autism, and might die soon.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the baby die? Because I refused to feed it.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what is worse finding a worm in your apple? Finding a grub in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what was postman pat's name before he was a postman? Pat.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you get when you cross a RPG with a cell phone? A microwave

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Twelve men walk into a bar, and get stuck in the door because it's far too small for all of them to walk through at the same time.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

My grandma told me to always keep my head up and just keep going. She fell down a manhole last week and died.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man comes into a bar. Wait, it's a horse. A man comes into a horse.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What would Steve Jobs be doing if he were alive today? Dying.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are red, Grass is greener, When I think about you, I play with my weiner

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Are you the only 10 I see? Because I'm blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the stoner visit anti-joke.com? Because he was bored, and probably kinda high.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops