A man offered a little boy a ride home. He drove the boy home where his father preceeded to beat him senseless.

What do an onion and a hamster have in common? They are both in my Grandma's omelette.

A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says, "We don't serve food here." The sandwich charges the barman for discrimination.

A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

10 years later...... a baby is born in Japan and has 26 toes due to radiation

What do you say to a horse at the vet? Good god, look at that ear infection.

what's worse than stubbing your toe? a hospital fire.

i am 26 why was i kidnapped 13 years ago cause i was in a badly written play

What do you call a man with no arms and half an eye? Larry -Jack Sparrow

What happens when Chuck Norris and Mr. T get into a car accident? They trade insurance information.

How do Germans treat the Jewish? Kindly, and with much hospitality.

Why did the chicken cross the road Because early that morning she had found out that her husband had left her for another chicken. She became depressed and soon was suicidal so she started looking for an option out of her pain. So she tried to cross the road... She never made it.

Why do cow say moo? Because you touch yourself at night

Jerry Sandusky and two other men are on a cruise ship, when it suddenly starts to sink. The first man says, "save the children!" The second man says, "screw the children!" Jerry Sandusky drowned.

three men walked into a bar, two walked out... One walked into a metal pole and died

Why did the vagina smell so bad? Because it had yeast infection.

Why do women have boobs? In order to feed their infants

Q: Whats A Schoolbus Full Of Black Children??? A: A Rotten Banana!!!

Why was Jimi's mom sad? Because Jimi suddenly fell to the floor clenching his neck while saying "I'm Dying!"

What happened to the fish? It drowned

Hey, I just met you And this is scabies So I'm prescribing you some permethrin.

You're momma is so dumb, she has troubles passing her math unit and should seriously consider a math touter

You are basically asking if I care for you, care for me, and if this could put us both in risk... There is no picking at this stage, why would I use you?

whats a muslims name with a bomb to his chest Whatever his name is HAHAHAHAHAH

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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