Why did the orange cross half way across the road Because it ran out of juice

thumb_up thumb_down +6

pudding

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the crab blush? It didn't because crab's can't blush.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the black man get stuck to the ceiling? Because he was spiderman.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the little girl cry when she fell off the slide? Because when she fell she hit the dirt ground, cause dust to fly into the air, he eyes started to water in response to keep her eyes from being damaged. The slide however, was taken down, too many children had been hurt while playing on it. The community is now pooling money together in order to build a new playground.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's the difference between an Elephant and a Post Box? An Elephant is not a Post Box. It is an Elephant.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red violets are purple what the hell happened to your ugly face

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Gotta disappoint you there, you see there are hundreds, perhaps thousands of similar organizations which work for the government, and those I work for are black ops, meaning that I would be putting my life in danger if I told you anything about it besides that fact. Its not listed anywhere, its not FBI, its not legislated by any government yet many governments invest their funds there, you could call it something like the interpool, and something like the underground society, except its multi-government driven... A term I sincerely do not fully understand myself, I have certain talents I put to use, but I lack the education in order to be more than a employee for these people.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

9 Cats on a boat. One Jumped off, how many left? 8.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the little girl die so suddenly? The bullet got her right in the heart.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the bartender say to the three-legged Irishman? What can I get you?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Go home and hang yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What happens to the yellow hat when it is thrown into the red sea? It get's wet.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why'd Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There Not Sally Why was the boy sad? Because he dropped his ice cream cone Why'd he drop his ice cream cone? Because he got ran over by a bus Why'd he get run over by a bus? BECAUSE SALLY WAS DRIVING

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q. Why did the boy fall off the swing? A. He had no arms or legs. Q. What did he get for Christmas? A. A drumset Q. Knock Knock Who's there Not him

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats grosser than a bloody hand? 2 bloody hands.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you do if your batteries die and you have none left? Go to your nearest battery selling retail store and buy some more.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What is worse than finding your parents dead? You being charged for the crime.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Yo' mama's so poor that she can't afford many of the privileges of everyday life.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock Knock. READ THE DAMN SIGN IT SAYS NO SOLICITORS!!! ... yeah.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the retarded guy follow the 7 year old? Because he's a stalker.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why didn't the cat eat its dinner? Because I nailed its head to the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

"This is Jesus Christ to Tim Tebow. Please leave me alone. Don't you know that my day off, is Sunday?"

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops