I heard the new Batman movie was to die for

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What happened after four homosexual clowns all squeezed into a little toy car simultaneously? Children and parents alike were amazed by this feat, and considered their $5 entrance fee very well spent.

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Q:: when artificial intelligence takes over the planet, what will become of anti-joke.com? A:: idk, but my cousin's girlfriend and I will get naked together and she will get on top of me and tell me I'm awesome and that my d*ck feels really good inside her. you see by the time AI takes over, the means to create virtual reality experiences will be greatly enhanced.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead.

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Why was the mother crying Her son was killed by a meteor

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A man was chopping wood, he then brought the wood to his house and lit a fire.

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Whats worse then the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple

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why couldn't max ride his bike? because max is a goldfish.

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What happened to the guy who ate the alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He died

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When life hands you lemons hand them back because you don't like lemons

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A hayride would be fun.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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there are 2 muffins in an oven they are cooked nicely and served as a tasty dessert

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Women's rights.

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Netball.

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My friend came out.....of the bathroom so I could shit

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why did the shark cross the road It didn't its a shark

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A guy vociferiously kills another person- fueled by the incentive of personal gain provided by his rapacious, human nature. He is an army soldier who's triumphant in battle and hoping to recieve a promotion. However, ultimately all he did was essentially insignificantt and his acts of purported valor were diametrically unnoticed by all except for his closest friends/allies. He never did supass his original self of a soldier and died of a natural cause that was disclosed only to the members of his immediate family.

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What do you get when you mix life and cyanide? Death.

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Q. Whats the difference between watermelons and people? A. Watermelons don't smoke pot...

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Whats the difference between black and white? nothing,because in art they are just shades.

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why doesnt cornelia say anything? she didnt answer

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What do you give an obese person with diabetes? Insulin.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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