Rap. Skate. Smoke.

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Why did the man put his money in the freezer? Perhaps he didn't believe in banks.

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Why are apathy,ignorance, and resentment alike? I dont know and I don't care to know.

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What's green, brown, red, and is covered with crumbs in a ditch on the side of the road? A girl-scout who got hit by a car...

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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What did the preist say to the other preist? 'hey! we're both preists!'

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What does a dishwasher and the holocaust have in common? Not much.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your Apple? Finding an apple in your worm

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What do you say on a date with Uma Thurman? Hey Uma, pass the salt.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A broken boomerang

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Why did the girl not get her mum a christmas present? Because she was adopted to two men when she was born, so it would be hard to give her mum a present...............................................

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm bitten in half in your apple.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it doesn't matter, it got turned into KFC before it crossed.

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Wanna here a joke? To bad you can't your black.

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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In 1284, while the town of Hamelin was suffering from a rat infestation, a man dressed in pied clothing appeared, claiming to be a rat-catcher. He loyally promised the townsmen a solution for their problem with the rats. The townsmen in appreciation and glad to get rid of the infestation promised to pay him for the removal of the rats, they were looking forward to being left in peace. The man pleased with their decision accepted, and played a mystical musical pipe to lure the rats with a joyous song into the Weser River, where all but one drowned. Despite his renowned success, the people reneged on their promise and refused to pay the rat-catcher the full amount of money. The man left the town angry and upset the people had betrayed his kindness, he did however vow to return some time later, seeking revenge. On Saint John and Paul's day while the inhabitants were happily sat in church, he played his pipe yet again, dressed in green, like a hunter, this time attracting the young and joyful children of Hamelin. One hundred and thirty boys and girls followed him out of the town, skipping in song as they went, where they were lured into a cave. The events that followed are now known as the 1284 mass child massacrer, in which all 130 children were raped and savagely tortured and killed one by one, each viscously taped and recorded for the pipe pipers satisfaction, where a copy of each tape was sent to their corresponding parents, this was before their bodies turned up dangling from a tree and the bottom of the village, all 130 of them unrecognisable from decomposition and mutilation the pipe piper had inflicted.

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What do two zebras look like next to each other? Two zebras

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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Yo momma is so fat, her total body volume is slightly larger than a normally proportioned person of smaller mass!

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Orange. Don't be ridiculous. Oranges can't talk.

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Knock knock knock OCD

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What do you call 4 Mexicans at the bottom of the ocean? Cuatro sinco.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? No. Neither has he.

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what did the elephant step on when he was running through the jungle? .... a coke machine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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