What is white, and hurts when it falls from a tree? -tom

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Jimmy: Knock, knock, Grandmother: Who's there? Jimmy: Jimmy Grandmother: Jimmy who? And then Jimmy held back tears as he knew grandmother's Alzheimer's disease was getting worse.

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all ur antijoke are belong to us or i mean we can share, whatever

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? As Suzy neared the ground while swinging, her foot caught a small hole in the swingset's pebble foundation, and the power of Suzy's momentum along with the sudden stop of Suzy's swing forced Suzy to fly forward off of the swing. Suzy, seeing the silliness of her mistake, laughed it off, and tried to get back up. She quickly realized that her leg had snapped in half. Suzy will never walk again.

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what does a gorilla do when it sleeps. it snores.

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What do you get if you cross a chicken and a potato? Answer- Chicken tasted potato

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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A man walked into a bar. It was closed, so I don't see how this was possible.

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hi

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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What's similar between a flamingo and a rhino? They're both pink...except the rhino

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The brunette and the redhead escape, but the blonde is captured. Why? Because she had a prosthetic leg sustained from a previous injury, and thus couldn't run very fast.

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why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

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whats worse than getting a fail on your math test? Getting shot.

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What happened to the guy who ate the alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He died

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Q: What did the one legged homeless person get for christmass? A: Frostbite.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

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Gay jokes are a real pain in the butt.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? He said, "Where's my tractor?"

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If you helped Jack on the horse, would you help Jack off the horse? Of course; if he was too short to climb onto the saddle then it would be irresponsible and potentially dangerous not to help him off. As his riding instructor, you would be liable for any injuries Jack sustained had he attempted to dismount the horse with no assistance.

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a: How can you tell you are not pregnant? b: I don’t know. a: Like this: I’m not pregnant.

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Christians

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Why did the gay man's ass hurt? He has rectal cancer.

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You are such a loner nothing even clings to you, not even plastic wrap!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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