What did Jimmy do on his 8th birthday? Turn 8.

Whats worse than finding a worm in a apple? Getting raped by a skorpian

A duck walks ino a bar...... f*ck this sh*t im going to candy land.

Whats worst than getting bombed by the russians? The holocaust!

your mom was so fat that she died.

Why don't you throw rocks at a black person riding a bike..... It could be yours

Q What did Stevens mum say when he asked to be an astronaut A no your heads too big

whts worse than finding a worm in your apple? butt sex with the devil

what's black, white, and red all over? a penguin stuck in a blending machine

I walked up to the door and I asked the door how r u door, and he said, I'm a door!

whats white jizz

Why was Justin Beiber Booed off the stage. Because I spelt his last name incorrectly.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

Why did the one friend hate the other friend? Because the one friend didnt do a map for social studies he should've done and skipped school for that class and when he came back, the other friend told the social studies teacher he was here and he had to turn in an unfinished poster and now he is a crybaby bitch about it.

A black man and a mexican are in a car. Whos driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

I have an excuse why one leg and one arm ar shorter than the ather two. I was born sideways and pulled out by an arm and a leg, trust me im not stupid or gay... ASSSSSSSSSSSHOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!..........................That was my turrets kickin in and i have dislexia if i didnt spell turrets right

women's rights

I found a new way to be condescending... Thats when you talk down to people.

Why did the grandma stop baking cookies? Because she is an aging widow suffering from depression because her family seems to forget her existance as she barely lives day by day wilting in her 1 bedroom home.

What do you call a man covered in bees? Nothing, you'll startle the bees!

Boys go to college to get more knowledge, girls go to Jupiter... Actually I lied, girls go to the kitchen

How do you stop a dog from barking? Cut it's head off

justin bieber over spongebob *snicker*

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...