Knock Knock Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident, your entire family is dead.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nobody. You'reschizophrenic and are hearing things. Go see a doctor. Now.

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In Soviet Russia... People were burned alive for refusing communism.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What did Helen Keller say to her eye doctor? Nothing, she is incapable of speech.

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I came across a woman on the ground and i said what happend and she said... "i tripped"

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9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape.

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A violent biker gang walks into a bar to have a few drinks, the bar tender says "I'm sorry we can not serve you here." They then proceed to beat the man violently.

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What has tomato Sauce And came from italy? Pizza

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roses are red violets are blue the stems are green they smell good

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What's the number one killer in America? Death.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Suisidal

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a man runs over his wife, who is at fault? -The man he shouldn't have been driving in the kitchen.

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car?.. Your Imagination

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What is E.T. short for? He has small legs

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So much oil was spilled into the ocean that it is killing animals.

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"Doctor, doctor! I think I've got Chlamydia!" "Yes, so you have told me. The urine sample you provided me with last week has come back positive. I'm sorry, sir, but you'll never be able to have children."

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Why did Dave buy a playstation? Because he wanted one.

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Knock knock. Who's there? George Washington. George Washington who? George Washington Carver.

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What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

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How many squirrels does it take to change a light bulb? 10 because they're so darn stupid!

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Q: Who's driving? A: The cops

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What do you call a Muslim driving a plane? You don't drive a plane.

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What rymes with milk..... milf

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops