What song does a bulimic person sing while on the toilet? Nothing Bulimic people don't poop.

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why are jews so cash hungry? because like the rest of us they are looking for a way to survive and feed their family.

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A black man, a jew and a muslim walk into a bar. ... I forgot what happens next, so let's just say they have a good time and get back home safely.

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God is like semen. They're both nouns.

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Shark bait.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a bench? A black guy is a living, breathing human being, and a bench is an inanimate object

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Whats the difference between a white man and a black man? black people have more melanin in their skin causing it to pigment and turn black

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Your mother is so ugly it affects her self esteem.

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Hey man. what? squidbillies.

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Q: What did the train say when it sneezed twice? A: Trains are inanimate objects, thus they cannot sneeze or talk. Are you an idiot?

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what do you call a toddler with a gun? uninteresting

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Q. How did the blind man cross the road A. By an abmulance which took him to the hospital because his first attempt to cross was unsuccessful and the hospital was conventeintly located on the other side of the road.

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Why did Sally drop her Ice Cream Cone? Because her dog licked her butthole.

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Knock Knock Who did that?

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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What did the girl call the boy? ugly. they hated eachother.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who is there? Not Suzie

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A Priest and a Rabbi find a very young lost child. They both agree that their religions obligate them to find the child shelter.

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Why was the student late for class? Because paraplegics can't drive.

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A man found out that he had hit the lottery and would be receiving 300 million dollars, but he had to fly to china to do so. The man took a plane to China from New York and would arrive within the next several hours. Meanwhile, in australia a god-cow was producing infinitely large amounts of concentrated milk. His milk was so infinitely large in mass that it collapsed on its own mass and turned into black hole; absorbing the entire Earth. The man never got to receive his money from winning the lottery

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: So it could get hit by a car, to prove that chickens have free will, and have every right to cross a road without any particualar reason.

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There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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