Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

Q. What's large, solid, and full of veins? A. A man or woman who frequently engages in weightlifting and follows a diet primarily based around high protein and low carbohydrate intake

Whats the fastest way to a man's heart?? Saw through his breastplate.

What did Elvis say when he lost his voice? Nothing.

Why did the chicken walk into Mordor? It didn't. One does not simply walk into Mordor.

Q: What does DNA stand for? A: National Dyslexic Association

What did the homeless guy do when he found a quarter? He picked it up

How do you evolve a Pikachu into a Raichu? You use a Thunderstone.

How do you occupy a blonde for a day ? You put her in a round room and tell her to sit in a corner. ... That or you strap a bomb to her, give her a list of twelve billion things to do, and tell her the bomb will explode if she doesn't do everything on the list.

What happened to the public server who went to the 5 dollar brothel? He contracted syphilis and died several months later.

Knock knock! Who's there? Atch! Okay.

Q. Whats the difference between watermelons and people? A. Watermelons don't smoke pot...

Welcome to Watchmojo dot com and today we'll be talking about the Top 10 numbers from 1 through 10. In this episode we will be discussing which numbers from 1 to 10 gain popularity and mainstream appeal amongst people from all over the world. Number 10. 10 (Ten) Number 9. 6 (Six) Number 8. 8 (Eight) Number 7. 4 (Four) Number 6. 5 (Five) Number 5. 3 (Three) Number 4. 2 (Two) Number 3. 9 (Nine) Number 2. 7 (Seven) Here are some honorable mentions: 3.14 9.9 1 and a half Number 1. 1 (One)

i came... i saw... -myself when i came.

Why was the gay kid made fun of........... because he was homosexual who was struggling in life

Your mama is so poor that she is on welfare, but she is ashamed to tell you and cries herself to sleep every night.

What's funner than a barrel of monkeys ? Not the Holocaust .

Knock Knock! Come in.

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

Why DIDN'T the skeleton cross the road? ..He didn't have any private parts

how do you make a baby float take you foot of its head

What do you call a small weapon used by northern russians? A Gun.

what is the biggest lie in the universe? -click to enter only if you are 18

Hi my name is Bob

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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