An alligator crawled into a bar Animal control is promptly called and he is released in a nearby lake

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Its alright for you to act like a bitch but its not allright for me to call u one

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How do u kill a horse? U stab it with a huge butcher knife

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Whats long hard and has seaman? A submarine!

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mangos mandarins mushrooms mustache :{

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Why didn't the baby learn to walk? It got hit by a car.

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Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon and Micheal Jackson molests little boys.

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why did the money fall out of the tree... because he was dead

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What's blue and wiggles? A baby in a bag

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Why is a four year olds bedroom the hottest place in Texas? Its on fire, like the rest of the state because of a tragic wildfire thats ruining the lives of many people.

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knock knock. who's there? interrupting black lady. wha....... ehmmm hmmmm!

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What do you call a fish with no "i's"? A blind fish.

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What did a husband do when he came home to find his wife murdering their children? Nothing. There is no excuse for domestic violence.

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Knock knock? Who is there? Nobody. Those were noises coming from your head.

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What is the difference between Barack Obama and Mitt Romney? One is President, the other is not.

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Ask me if I'mm a candy cane. Shutup, there are a lot of these types of jokes. Create your own you poophead.

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Mexican? I dont care if you are Mexican or not really, it makes no difference to me, I know you, I seen you before. But seriously, I consider you a good friend and all, and it seems we both get along, but you know after stuff happens, are we still friends then or is this all just a mating game thing for you? You can be honest with me, I am a realist, and I kinda like the idea of,the day after tomorrow, wont deny that. Its just that I dont want to lose a good friend in the process, and if this is just you trying to score, then well, I guess its still nice knowing this side of you.

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What do you call a discrase of a living enviorment? African huts there so muddy

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Dinosaurs are extinct.

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what do hookers and bungee jumping have in common? They are both 100$ to be in/on and if the rubber breaks your screwed

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3 Women were on a desert Island, This Island was situated in the middle of the Atlantic so there was no hope of survival.

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Why are women bad drivers? -There are no roads in between the bedroom and the kitchen.

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why did graeme go to olivias house to do fun things

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Why cant Joe drive his tractor? Because he doesn't have any arms or legs. Why doesn't Joe have any arms or legs? BECAUSE JOE IS A POTATO.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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