Tina: Mom, would you love me if I was straight Mom: Yes Tina: Would you love me if I was gay Mom: Yes Tina: Would you love me if I was Bi Mom: No Tina: Why not Mom: Because that's selfish!

Why did the boy trip over the garden gnome? He didn't trip. He died of a burst artery.

So Nero, what the fuck are you doing? XD

What did the orphan get for his birthday? Shit on.

My friend thought that an onion was the only food that could make you cry, so I threw a watermelon at his face.

A man gets three wishes from a talking banana. His first wish is for a gay lover, his second wish is to have a naked grizzly bear, and his third is to become a professional tennis player. Soon after he got Aids from the Grizzly bear.

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Why didn't john go to school? He has terminal cancer and he must stay at hospital

Doctor, people dont notice me anymore, doctor?... HEEEEEEEEEEEY!

Why is Abraham Lincoln a bad driver? Because he is dead.

What did one Platypus say to the other Platypus? Nothing, Platypuses can't talk. However, they are the only mammal to lay eggs.

A drum and a cymbal fall off a cliff...

What did the Jewish man say to the Shia faction Muslim man? Even though we have different views on god and religion I value your friendship more than my religous views.

What did Buzz say to Woody? A lot. There were 3 movies.

Bob is asleep. Knock knock. Whos there? NOT BOB

What starts with an N and ends with R, that you wouldn't want to call a black person? Neighbor

Why did Bob get off the swing? Because he was done.

whats the difference between me and callum ? one soul.

Why did the man fall over...he had a stroke!

what do you call cheese thats not yours? stolen, your under arrest

A muslim is working quietly in his 3rd floor apartment complex bedroom. ~~~~ He's been working on high explosives for 8 months now, preparing to kill innocent people.

Why did the man Jump of a bridge? Because he got sick of his life and he wanted to die.

What you do you call a gay man with no arms and legs? His name.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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