Sometimes i like to stand on my chair and pretend that i am a carrot.

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Whats black and white and musty? A nuns pussy because it never gets used.

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What's sad about a mexican man dying in a car crash? He had a family that loved and cared for him.

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Why was Susie crying? There was a frog stapled to her face.

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Whats black and white and says moo? A Dalmatian retriever with a voice box.

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A man goes to the store to buy a kitten. While there, he decides to buy two because he is feeling particularly hungry.

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How do you get Pikachu on a bus? Through forceful action.

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who do you call those who give this joke a thumbs down? people

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roses are red, violets are blue, your boyfriends thinks i'm hot that's why he dumped you

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Did you know that in Africa, every 60 seconds... A minute passes. So sad

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Q: Why did the Mexican mother leave her baby in the hot car during summer? A: Because she was irresponsible and forgetful.

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What's the difference between a battered woman and a regular woman. There is absolutely no difference...

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What do you call a black doctor? Ehh...

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9

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What is the gay guy thinking about? Penis

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whats the difference between a ferrari in my garage, and a pile of dead babies in my garage. I do not have a ferrari but i do have a pile of dead babies

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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why do german shower have eleven holes? jews have 10 fingers

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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why did the Chinese guy take steroids? He didn't he's naturally small.

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What's the difference between a bucket of shit and a black guy? -the bucket.

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I don't always drink beer but when I do, I viciously beat my wife and children.

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Who smokes a lot of weed and speaks 5 different languages? Rosetta Stoner.

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Where did little susie go during the explosion? Everywhere :) What color were her eyes? Blue. One blew this way and one blew the other way. :p Knock, knock Who's there? Not susie :)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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