Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms.

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How is a fat girl like a tiny motorcycle? She isn't, and you should be ashamed of yourself for even thinking how she might be.

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GONNA

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What happened when the man got into the taxi? The driver shot him 17 times in the chest and ran away

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What's gayer than Justin Beiber? The guy getting a blowjob from him! Kelvin Yang.

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Whos better at Hide and go Seek, Anne Frank or Osama Bin Laden? -Why dont you tell me, they're both dead !

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What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust? What's worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings.

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Ehh

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If a quiz is quizzical, what's a testicle?

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How do you tick off a Doctor? You cut off his right thumb.

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Q: why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: because it was dead.

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What´s Green and turns Red at your Finger Tips? Frog in a Blender.

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A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

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Why didnt Timmy Go to school? He Died.

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what did the bannana say to the milk carton. nothing bannanas cant talk and their on the other side of the store

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Why did the car fall of the cliff? The dude driving the car was driving recklessly.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Dropping your biscuit in your cup of tea.

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Why did the boy eat his homework? Because he was hungry. The teacher would stupid to say it was a piece of cake

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Why couldn't Matilda walk to school? Because a dog ripped her legs off.

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How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Eight, because there's one tickle per tentacle!

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a registered sex offender

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“When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!”

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How many men does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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A man walks into a Norfolk pub. The landlord (not being very worldly) notices he is of Middle Eastern descent and asks "are you Bin Laden"? To this the man replies "No I bin Swaffham". (Needs to be said in Norfolk accent)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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