Why did the motorcyclist die? I heard he was sat on by Chuck Norris.

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How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

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Hey guess what? Nevermind.

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Who's fat? Holly Davis.

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What do u call a guy that loves the color blue? A smurf

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have multiple personality disorder, NO YOU DON'T!

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women sitting on a bench quietly. they have no ability to speak.

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anti-joke teehee

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What do you call a group of black men jumping off a building? Chocolate Rain

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Why do people discriminate against black people? Because they show an undeserving amount of disrespect towards the rest of the world and why should they get anything better than what they offer.

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There was a small boy with a lollipop and a spinning hat. He died of lieukemia.

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Have you seen stevie wonders house? Nope... Neither has he

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What happened to the Caucasian man who went to Vegas? He lost all his money so the government took away his car and his house so he had to become homeless and live on the streets begging for money from any who walked by until he slowly starved to death after eating food left in restaurants and trashcans.

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Women are like puzzles. Because prior to 1920 neither had the right to vote. Puzzles still don't

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A cannibal wearing a sport coat, grey slacks, and a pink tie walks into a bar holding a duck in one hand, a chicken in the other, and chewing on a human arm. He is subsequently shot by one of the patrons. There's a concealed weapons law here.

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Why did the tree fall? I cut it.

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What is pink and smells like green paint? Pink paint

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What's the difference between a duck? An armchair, because a vest has no sleeves.

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What do you call a group of homosexuals placing an order at McDonalds? Gay

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Joshua Brown was in a dark forest, with a misty haze surrounding him. He turned quickly and flicked his hair out of his face. Dylan Hodge appeared and they had wild sex all night!

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what did the penguin say to the dodo bird. nothing because dodo birds have bin extinct for thousands of years and it is highly unlikely for a dodo bird to be saying anything to a penguin do to the fact they wouldn't be anywhere near each other and neither species can speak.

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what is the difference of left and right? i used my right hand to stab your mother.

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Q: What do you call a hillbilly with 12 girl friends? A: A shepherd.

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Do you know what really makes me smile? Facial Muscles.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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