- Anti Joke

What does the funeral director say at a jewish funeral? Ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes...

Roses are black, violets are black. I'm Hellen Keller.

Roses are red, Violets are blue Oh, that's good to know.

Why is the dog in the driver seat? Why is there birds making you filet mignon? Why is your toe blue? I don't know the answer. Go talk to your doctor

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay guys house Knock Knock Who's there? The chicken

An overweight man is at a gym. he is trying to lose weight because he feels uncomfortable with his size.

I've just been struck by an enormous bolt of lightning. I am covered in boils and my house is full of frogs. I strongly recommend that when referring to God, always use the upper case 'H' on all personal pronouns.

Are you from Tennesse because my uncle grew up there and I was wondering if you knew him.

What do you call an earthquake on Mars? There is not enough water on planet Mars for something like that to happen.

Do you have ass-thma? Coz your ass is taking my breath away

A woman sees a sign on a store that says "husbands for sale." Curious, she walks inside. The clerk says "These men will be perfect husbands, they'll cook and clean for you and see to your every need." Shocked, the woman calls the police and reports the store for human trafficking.

A man walks into a bar later at night & the bartender says how was your day the man replies "well I found out my mom is a raging crack addict, my grampa has alzheimer's & i have terminal cancer" how was yours the bartender says "I found out im Hitlers lost son".

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Last year my wife ran away with my best friend. I really miss him.

A bar walks into a man... Wait, that's impossible.

Why are black people so good at basketball? Because they practice.

Why didn't Johns book get published? He had dyslexia.

why did bill gates sue his banks? Because he can

Me: f*** off Asshole: YOU'RE MOM! Me: -is dead.

A group of Germans eagerly await the FIFA football rankings. England is fourth.

what do you get if you cross the mafia and the yakuza? a hefty bounty on your head

What does a casino have in common with a woman liqur in the front, and poker in the back

Roses are red, Violets are violet. The man who wrote this, Was high as shit.

why did the car go to the bathroom? it had gas.

Are you from Tennessee? Because you look like a product of incest