Two guys walk in to a bar the third one ducks.

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What did the little girl with no arms or legs get for christmas? Cancer.

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What did the Pikachu say to the Charmander? Pika pika pikachu pika!

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whats the difference between a chicken and a grape? there both green exept for the chicken

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so a baby seal walks into a club...

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What do you call a group of black men jumping off a building? Chocolate Rain

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How do you kill something thats already dead? You don't. It's dead.

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Your mother is such a whore that she has consensual sex with a lot of people...

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I like turtoes.

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What's the difference between a duck? An armchair, because a vest has no sleeves.

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A father and son are involved in a car crash. The father is killed, sadly, but the boy is rushed to the hospital. The doctor prepares for surgery, and since this boy has no family-connections to her, she performs successful surgery on him, and the boy goes home after 3-5 days.

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A man walks into a bar... But, it's not funny because he's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

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Q: What's the Difference between Judaism and Catholicism? A: There are many substantial and vital distinctions between Judaism and Christianity. Of course, there are many similarities as well, primarily because Christianity emerged from Judaism. However, the emergence was not a direct line. Christianity broke from Judaism, forming a new religion, so it is misleading, however comfortable the thought might be, to believe that the two religions are essentially the same, or to see Christianity as the natural continuation of Judaism.

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Itookasipasoda

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Q. Whats the difference between watermelons and people? A. Watermelons don't smoke pot...

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. The single celled amoeba. As billions of years passed, the simple amoeba began to form limbs which it utilized to crawl its way out of the ocean onto dry land. Millions of years would pass before the simplified organism began to develop into a fully functional chicken.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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A black kid, an Asian kid, and a Jewish kid walk into a barrier. They are students at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and they walk straight through the barrier onto Platform 9 3/4.

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BUT HWY?

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What do Kenyans do at night? Starve.

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A Priest and a Rabbi walk into a grocery store. As they walk past the meat section, the Priest stops, smiles, and turns to the Rabbi. "Feeling Hungry?" The Rabbi reaches down and picks up a pack of Koscher hotdogs.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody because a sponge is not a who, it is a what.

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How many midgets does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. Midgets are capable of doing an average person's everyday task. Unless they have autism, then they might as well die.

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Two penguins are sitting in a bathtub. One looks at the other and says, "Can you pass the soap?" The other penguin says, "What do i look like, a typewriter?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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