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Why did the old man cry? Because he had just witnessed his wife die.

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What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

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4 men walk into a bar. They have fun. ~Yasmin~

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Jake: When was war of 1812? Harry: 1812 Jake: Oh.

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why was the pineapple bullied at school? cuz it was a pineapple duhhhhhhh

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I wrote a funny joke.

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What's the correct way to eat spaghetti? Put it in your mouth.

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Hi, my name is Jake.

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Knock-Knock Who's there? Ketchup. Ketchup who? Ketchup-mustard.

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Q: Why did Hitler Kill himself? A: Because his wife couldn't match the pleasure of his massive Nazi Orgies

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Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

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Sex education in Texas.

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw a lightbulb? None, they couldn't cross the border.

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Puns are terrible. I love them.

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Why was 7 afraid of 6? It saw what 6 and 9 do when they're together.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What did one muffin say to the other? I'm baked... just kidding muffins are food and therefore can not speak

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what is the difference between a a person and a book? people can walk

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What do you call 100 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A weird kind of genocide.

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What is Wonder Woman's drug of choice? Heroine.

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Doctor: I bring grave news. Your wife is dying. She won't survive for another 100 years. Concerned and anguished Husband: Oh... that's ok! Doctor: Oh did I say years? I meant days! Oh the mirth! *The doctor breaks down into hysterical laughter, which the Concerned and Anguished Husband is furious to see, as the Doctor is taking delight out of such a grave situation.

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A man with a barbie doll walks into a bar. He goes up to the bartender and says "I bet you $100 that I can turn this barbie doll into a beautiful lady". The bartender laughs and says "Okay." The man takes out a brush and begins brushing the doll's hair. Seconds later the man has a seizure and falls to floor a dies. It turns out he was a drug addict and had a fatal over dose. The bartender never got his $100.

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What's the difference between a baby and a textbook? You throw a textbook at the wall with TWO hands.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops