What magical power enables Spongebob to talk? There is no magical power. he is a cartoon therefore making him be able to anything in anyone's wild dreams.

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Want to hear a joke? Me to...

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Butter. Butter who? Oh, um, sorry i forgot the rest...

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Why'd the cat have one eye? It got kicked by a goat.

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what do you call skiediving? a very fun but moderatly dangerouse sport that many people have fun doing from the ages of 19 to 31

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What's the difference between a duck?

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Q: why did the boy cross the road A: because he was being chased by a pedophile

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Why don't Polish girls swim in the sea? The only sea that Poland borders on is the Baltic. Throughout most of the year this sea is too cold to comfortably swim in.

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What is black and white and red all over? A zebra that has been shot, because poaching is quite common in many African savannas.

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How many jews can get in a Volvo? 5.

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Where do you find your quadriplegic dog? Right where you left it.

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Why did little Jimmy eat his finger ? He was hungry.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the postman, I have a package you need to sign for.

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whats red and smells like blue paint? Hank Kovalcik

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says its getting hot in here the other muffin say holy shit a talking muffin.

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two muffins were in an oven. one muffin says, "gee, its hot in here." the other one says, "AH! A TALKING MUFFIN!"

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Whats the difference between a new ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a new ferrari in my garage.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was recently released from prison for violent crimes.

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Knock Knock Come in Thank you very much. Don't mention it. Would you like a home made spinach roll?

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Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come out, what are you inside? American! What are you, a communist?

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? He was on his way home from work and saw some youths loitering on the street corner and thought it best to avoid them and therefore any possible confrontation. He would also appreciate it if you would call him something along the lines of Bravery impaired instead of a chicken as he finds it offensive and doesn't fully understand the avian reference to his lack of confidence.

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Jesus

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops