How many calories are in a bag of Fritos? 160 calories.

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why did suzie fall of the swings? because she had no arms.

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What's similar between a yellow bicycle and blue potatoes? They both have weight.

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Yo mama so stupid, she waited for the stop sign to say go

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

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NEVER

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How do you know if someone is vegan? They'll tell you.

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park in a safe and risk free process.

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Why did the Taxi crash? The cab driver was trying to remove the frog stapled to his face.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He didn't. He threw at the girl, and that's why she fell off the swing.

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Why did the beaver cross the road? To meet Justin Bieber!

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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What's Tyrion Lannister short for? It's not short for anything, it's his full name.

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Q: What would you think if a homeless person asked, "Spare change for drugs and cigarettes?" A: At least he was being honest.

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*see an orphan* Knock knock Whos there Not you parents ...

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A black man walks into a store with a ski mask on... what does he do?? he buys skiis.

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What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night and see your tv floating in mid air? Drop It Niggher!

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how could you not hav not died of dehyderation?

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Patrick: My name is 24. Spongebob: Hey, Patrick, you know whats worse than 24? Patrick: What? Spongebob: 911.

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why did the guy cross the road? Because he felt like it

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I have a joke Who is better, Kobe or Lebron? Kobe. But I lied, that wasn't a joke.

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A duck walks into a bar Its theoretical comical universe implodes from the destructive weight of inevitable punchlines and everyone in the bar dies.

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Why did the blonde get a good occupation? Because she had a great education in a private school.

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whats 7+4? 74

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops