how do you make a baby float take you foot of its head

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I went to see a fight and all of a sudden a hockey game broke out.

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What do you call a man with a sack of money running from a bank? A rich man.

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It was the eve of December and a man was using a blanket why? because it was cold and he wanted to be able to function properly at work so his boss would not get mad at him because he respected his boss and wanted to make him happy

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Jesus wept.

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why cant the black guy vote? because hes not 18 yet.

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hi

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knock knock whos there? your mother your mother who? ...........what?

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What rymes with milk..... milf

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What's the difference between a duck?

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Your mommas so fat that she has developed adult onset diabetes.

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A man who is down on his luck was told that when one door closes a window opens. So he jumped out.

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Q: How do you get a bunch of mexicans attention? A: Say excuse me, can I have your attention please?

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If a tree falls on a house and there's no one there to hear it....Why was there no woman in the kitchen?

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Why did the blonde fall down? She got shot in the head.

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lebron

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A Squirrel jumps into a bar, lands on one of the empty tables and begins eating the Peanuts out of a bowl. The bartender thinks to himself "I really should close that window to keep the Squirrels out..."

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. The single celled amoeba. As billions of years passed, the simple amoeba began to form limbs which it utilized to crawl its way out of the ocean onto dry land. Millions of years would pass before the simplified organism began to develop into a fully functional chicken.

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A blond and a brunette took an IQ test. Both of them scored above average.

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BUT HWY?

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Roses are Red Voilets are Red I am Red I am Dead

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What did one platypus say to the other? Whatever noise platypuses make. I'm not sure. I am sure that they lay eggs though.

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I bought a DVD called "the 18 holes of Tiger Woods". It was a fascinating incite into the golfing technique of arguably one of the greatest sportsmen of all time.

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A Priest and a Rabbi walk into a grocery store. As they walk past the meat section, the Priest stops, smiles, and turns to the Rabbi. "Feeling Hungry?" The Rabbi reaches down and picks up a pack of Koscher hotdogs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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