What did the broom say to the vacuum cleaner? "Your mom sucks."

Who needs god when coffee is cheaper

What is the difference between a feminist and a gun? A gun only has one trigger

What do you get when you rape a dead baby filled with jalapeños? A lifetime in prison, and a burning penis.

What is both bold and brash? Fox

whats black and hangs from my tree a plum

A man saw a dinosaur yesterday. He had a very nice time at the museum.

Two egyptian soccerclubs are playing, what's the score? Over 70 dead

Knock Knock Who's there? Cindy Cindy who? No it's Cindy Lou Who!

What's the same about a duck-billed platypus and a duck? They both have a duck bill on their face... Duh!

Why did the elephant die? It was murdered by poachers for it's valuable ivory tusks.

What makes a subaru a subaru? The fag thats driving it

You know what happens when you plant a baby into the soil and give it lots of sun and water? It dies.

Joe: CHOP CHOP KICK PUNCH HI-YAH! Mike:What are you doing? JOE: PRACTICING CHPO MENTAL KICK KARATE!!!!!!!

What would you get if you crosses a potato and a frog? Nothing because potatoes cannot breed with animals

A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. I just bought a new xbox.

Q: Where do zombies shop? A: Zombercrombie.

Blacks

What shoes keep dogs quiet? Hush puppies.

Why was the blonde walking funny? She had a ten foot long metal bar shoved up her butt, and it was very painful to walk.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reading the dumbass things that people come up with as an answer.

What do shoes and boxes have in common Both will get squashed if a washing machine lands on one of them

Yo momma so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, No Professionals."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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