What did Woody say to Buzz? A lot. There were three movies.

Yo mama so fat because it's in her genes.

What is green, red, and goes 70 mph? A frog in a blender

roses are red violets are blue i have five fingers the middle ones for you

Why shouldn't you download music? Various reasons.

What do you call a guy sleeping with little boys? Michael Jackson

If you like piña coladas! You might be an alcoholic

What is wet, white and sticky? Glue, of course.

Knock knock ... Guess they aren't home.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing.

Why did the boy get nothing from Santa? He's Jewish.

How fast can you paint a fence with babies? Depends how fast you can throw them.

What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

If life throws you fried chicken your probably black

How many blondes does it take to walk into a bar? One I guess. I don't know if I understand the question.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it has a serious crack addiction and there was a drug dealer on the other side.

Q: Why can't Carl drive? A: Carl is a stone

Why did Dr. Phil fall of the swing? He couldn't figure out the couples problem.

what do you use to blindfold chinese person? dental floss!!

What time is it? I just looked at my clock on the wall. It is 9:14 AM Eastern Standard Time.

Why does 1+1=2? Dunno, e-mail me if you do.

How do you rescue a fat girl that's stuck under a car? With a pickaxe and a donkey.

What's worst than getting hit by a car. -Getting hit by a truck.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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