Where can I find a good Prostitute? Your Parents House.

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Roses are red. They also have thorns. Their family is Rosaceae and they are often given as gifts between lovers. They grow in well drained and fertile soils...

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What is 100(1+1) -100 + 50 x2 - 300? 0. But who cares? The answer is as worthless as you.

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What do you call a man with no legs or arms trying to ski? Impossible.

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What's worse than getting no up-votes on an anti-joke? Getting down votes

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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A drum and a cymbal fall off a cliff...

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How do you stop a baby from crawling around in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor.

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What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? He called the police.

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A black duck walks into a bar. Duck: "I'll have a beer." Bartender: " How you paying for that?" Duck: "Put it on the tax payers."

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Q: How many different Pokèmon are there? A: Pokèmon aren't real.

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I have a great knock knock joke. You start. Go.

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What the difference between a rabbit an a eagle? They both fly except for the rabbit

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Q. What did one wall say to the other wall? A. Peekaboo I see you.

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why did the woman commit suicide? because 2+2=4

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What do you get when two chickens cross a road? -Salmonella stricken hobos

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What did the bus say to the short bus? Heh, you're retarded..

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Someone clearly messed up on naming the flower. Violet is synonymous with purple, Which is obviously NOT blue; It's the mixture between blue and red.

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Yo momma is so stupid, she has no job, five kids, and six weeks to live, due to the fact she spent all her money on cigarettes and now has lung cancer.

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Girl goes to see a sex therapist. Girl says, "Doc, though this has never been a problem, for the past 3 months I have been unable to reach climax. Can you help me?" Doc says, "Yes.". And after an intense 18 months of therapy the doctor helped the girl to discover that her inability to reach climax was related to issues of childhood sexual abuse. And after another 36 months of therapy the girl finally found the courage to confront and forgive her unrepentant abuser, as she realized that by not forgiving him, it was like drinking poison while hoping that he would die. And though the doctor did help her,as he had said, the girl never regained her ability to reach climax again.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer murdered his family

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knock knock. who's there? interrupting black lady. wha....... ehmmm hmmmm!

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Your mom is so stupid, she stole free samples.

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Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell off and bumped his head Mama called the doctor and the doctor said "There is no cure for the monkeys in your head"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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