How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, and they don't have to be blonde, anyone can screw in a light bulb.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs sky diving? I don't know, but that sounds like a highly improbable circumstance.

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whats worst then antijokes? the holocaust

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What do you call a bookstore with explosive offers? Barnes and Cher-Noble.

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Where did the kid go when the bomb exploded? Everywhere

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Thank you for flying Buzzy Fly Airlines. Today we'll be flying around Uranus.

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What's the best part about having sex with a 9 year old in the shower? Pedophilia is a crime, and the people that do it are very sick individuals. The fact that you even thought there was a 'best' part disgusts me.

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What do you get when John pulls your toe off the waterfall and takes three from an caramel? -6 to the power of golf.

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Knock knock" my mom says not to talk to strangers!"

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What's the difference between a dead dog lying in the middle of the street and a dead black man lying in the middle of the street? The physical differences you would commonly expect to be between a human being and a dog.

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Why did the Asian ace the test? Because she had worked very diligently, taken copious notses, and studied fervently until she had a thorough mastery of the topic.

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Q: why are black people good at basketball A: god you racist bastard

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A Muslim walks into a Bar, He buys everyone a round of drinks and enjoys the rest of his night

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What is better than getting a job? Getting a better job.

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You're on a bus and the driver is black, you're white friend turns to you and says, We're gonna have a race on the highway!

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What’s worse than being ruled by Adolf Hitler? Being ruled by Joseph Stalin.

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DID YOU HEAR THE FBI INVENTED A TELEPHONE THAT THEY CAN USE TO CALL THE DINOSAURS? ITS TRUE! Them DAMN DINOS REFUSE TO PICK UP THEIR CELLPHONES THOUGH! Nero: This is not completely accurate though, a T-Rex called us twice actually, but he just kept roaring, making communication impossible... ...That sad moment when you post a totally non ofensive joke, then to tell you that I might your father, me or one of the sixthy guys that bukkaked your mother which was sucking off a dog and... Anyway problem solved!

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How do you confuse a blond? Look at her

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Q:What were Helen Keller's dying words? A: Speaking is difficult when you have no way of hearing others. Apart from that, just hours before you die, you become unaware of your surroundings, and have a harder time communicating. Both these problems merged together made it basically impossible for her to speak before death.

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So a man walks into a bar carrying a giant clock. One of his friends asks, "Hey, whats up with the clock?" His friend then responds, "A goddamned genie gave it to me, i can't take it anymore. Here take his lamp." The man decided to rub the lamp and thinks to himself, "Gee, I'm gonna wish for 1 million dollars." The genie comes out and asks the man, "What wish could i grant you today?" The man says, "I wish i could have 1 million dollars!!" The genie replies, "As you please." All of a sudden, a studded dog collar appears. Then another, and another. Soon there were 1 million dog collars in the bar. The man yells, "WHAT IS THIS?!?! I DIDNT WISH FOR 1 MILLION COLLARS!!!" His friend then replies, "I didn't wish for a giant clock either...."

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How do you kill a red elephant? You can't red elephants don't exist.

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The only difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer is the taste.

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-You know what will always get people fighting? -Hey, you wanna fight?

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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