Knock, knock. Who is there? Child services, here to take your children. The following day, there is another knock at the door. Who is there? The police. The woman runs into the kitchen and kills herself.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Jack and Jill went up a hill to snort a little coke, Jack felt horny , so did Jill. But unfortunately Jack cant's maintain an erection no matter how turned on he is.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why was the little girl sad? An elephant shat on her face

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man walks in to a bar with a frog stapled to his head. The bar tender says What the heck is that. The frog says I don't know this thing has been coming out of my but for two days

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: What's purple and eats desks. A: My dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What was so special about Anna Frank's diary? Nothing. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the man write with a pen on paper? Because he was writing a novel.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What happened to the kids bike? It broke when he got hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +11

your mom is so fat jesus couldnt even lift her spirits

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call a guy with an ax in his chest? An ambulance.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

So 185 cowboys walk into a bar and the bartender says "I can't serve 185 cowboys!" The cowboys ask why not and the bartender says "Because that would exceed the legal maximum occupancy of this building."

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Roses are blue Violets are red What happened to the gay man? He listened to Justin Beiber And then was straight

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How many pairs of jordans does your dad have? None, he lost both his legs in vietnam.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was very scary.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the black man say after he swallowed the bicycle? He didn't say anything. Swallowing a bicycle is physically impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How can you tell if a duck is under your bed? Look under your bed

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A black person went into a store and paid full price for his tv

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call a guy with a bomb strapped to his chest flying a plane? A pilot with a bomb strapped to his chest

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what is long, white, and used almost everywhere? there are a lot of things that fit this description, so it would be highly illogical to make a guess.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Its about rewriting the laws of the universe and nothing less, yes yes theoretically the subconcious has unlimited potential (or at least potential we humans cannot theoretically comprehend nor define). But what if I can use my consciousness to trick my subconsciousness? What if I use the subconsciousness to trick the consciousness into tricking the subconciousness?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

That Rachael chick needs to get back in the kitchen

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Okay, after this one then...

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops