Q: whats worse than finding a worm in your apple A: the holocaust

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What did Sir Mix a lot say to the girl with a big butt? Your very beautiful.

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What's worse than getting a F on your History test? The millions of children around your age that cannot even afford to go to school, most likely because they live in a third world country.

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Why was the plumber sad? Because his whole family died in a plane crash.

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Why did the little hamster die? Because it had a careless owner who never paid any attention to it. therefor it passed away.

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Q: What did the pedestrian say to the bus driver that hit him? A: Nothing, he died.

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What's similar between a yellow bicycle and blue potatoes? They both have weight.

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What's worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice

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Knock knock Who's there? Hi I'm John from the jehovah witness society down the street and I'd love to talk to you about your beliefs! Would you like a pamphlet?

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Michael Jackson walks into a bar. Everyone runs out, screaming, "AH, a dead guy is walking!"

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"Hey hey hey, did you hear the joke about the guy with terminal cancer?" "No." "Sorry to break it to you then."

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A man walked into doctors and said, “Doctor help! My arms have stopped working” to which the receptionist replied, “I’m not the doctor and you need to make an appointment.”

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An Asian couple walks into a bar, orders a few drinks, pays, and leaves

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could get back before curfew.

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One day a man discovered he could suck his own penis. Unfortunately he was heterosexual and could derive no pleasure from doing so as he was acutely aware of the fact he had a penis in his mouth.

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What do you get if you cross a egg and toast? Egg n soldiers.

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What does a dinosaur and TImmy's mom have in common? They're both dead

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Roses are Red ?And sometimes yellow ? My mother is mellow ? Billy you have cancer ?

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what happens when an Indian walks into a bar? they realize they found there way home

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Whats the similarity between a bike and a black person? They are both stolen

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A Dog walked into a bar and the bartenter said 'What can i get you' the dog dident say aneything cuz its a dog!!!!!

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your mommas so stupid she has trouble doing things an average person would manage easily

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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Why does the man hate his job? He thinks working sucks?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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