What's cheese that's not yours? Mine.

Ever since I've been using chloroform as cologne I've been getting laid a lot.

Why did the man with brain cancer die? He drove his Segway off a cliff.

Why can't Jay cut his hair? Because he has AIDS

A Man goes into a watch store. Why? To buy a watch

Q:What are black basketball players good at? A:Running,shooting and stealing.

Burger King cashier: Are you on Team Jacob or Team Edward? Man: I'm on team I'm freaking hungry; now give me my food!

What can be any colour and is made of leather? Cars. I lied about the leather part.

make me a sandwich!

roses are red violets are blue you look like a monkey lets take you to the zoo if by chance you try to escape ill take my fist and smash your little monkey face! btw i made this up if you use it ill kick your nuts!!!!

What's the difference between a teacher and a train? A lot.

A guy and a girl had sex, it was casual.

Knock knock Who's there? Timmy Timmy who? Timmy Smith

knock knock Who's there? because 7 ate 9

What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being cut in half by a human while you were trying to eat an apple

What did the boy who succsesfully came out of liposection get? Diobeeties.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face (pokerface)

What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? "Hey, what's up?"

You're momma's so fat, she's got high cholesterol.

why did the girl smear penut butter on the road. To go with the trafic jam

"Welcome to Mcdonalds, Would you like to try our new Chicken BigMac today?" "No"

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

what did the hobo do when he saw timmy get hit by the bus and drop his ice cream? stole the ice cream and laughed

What's brown and smells Iike crap? My brother he doesn't shower and is Hispanic

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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